Important News

We have released Shinobi Life Online Pre-Alpha Version 1.1.0.0! This update features Earth Release: Earth Dome Jutsu, Aiming Mode and more! Try it out and tell us what you think.

User

Welcome, Guest.
Please login or register.
 
 
 
Forgot your password?

Discord

Statistics

Members
Total Members: 54880
Latest: BLACKS
New This Month: 57
New This Week: 3
New Today: 3
Stats
Total Posts: 55618
Total Topics: 3337
Most Online Today: 832
Most Online Ever: 4232
(January 14, 2020, 07:47:33)
Users Online
Members: 0
Guests: 780
Total: 791
Google (AdSense)
Google (10)

Author Topic: Chapter 13 - Burn, baby, burn  (Read 4992 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Fraudulent

  • Pink Chunin Donator
  • Sennin Poster
  • **
  • Posts: 1 086
  • Reputation Power: 5
  • Fraudulent has no influence.
  • The Rose That Grew From Concrete
    • View Profile
  • Organization: BlackboxYoru
Chapter 13 - Burn, baby, burn
« on: July 08, 2017, 16:57:56 »
Dara sauntered stealthily towards his unwelcomed visitors; persistent with the same nasty smirk, he managed to attract their attention.

“Give him a little longer, and you will become witnesses of the true power hidden within”

The rescue squad hastily pulled back with alert and stared at the tall, half naked, well-built figure towering above them.
Vizier’s kunai glistened to the candlelight as he raised it at Dara.

“Who are you, and where’s Kimoto?!” he yelled.

Dara raised his chin with arrogance and withdrew his katana from behind – it had a black blade made from the highest quality obsidian shards.

“My name is unimportant; it is my blade you will remember”

“As for your friend… rummage through that pile over there, you might find something” he twisted his body, placing a pile of bones and skulls in the spotlight.

Nibui raised himself and staggered around in a small circle in front of Vizier.

“Brother…” painful groans escaped his lips as the now burned shirt tore off his body, clearly revealing the marking on his back.

The spotlight found itself on the young leader as attention was drawn to him.

“Enough talking!” one of the members of the pursuit squad initiated an attack, angrily dishing out a shuriken towards Dara.

Although the deadly weapon ripped through the air at grand speeds, Dara remained stationary and clamped it with two fingers right in the circular gap at the centre.

“Are you sure you wanted to do that?” Dara tilted his head in question, his tone of voice dispersed chills down the spines of his enemies.

“Here, you can have another try” He pulled back and sent the shuriken to the right, it quickly boomeranged at a low angle in an oval motion towards the squad member. This time the weapon was dispatched at immeasurable speeds, and it was only a matter of a couple seconds before it began tearing flesh away, as each individual blade scraped and tugged at the abdomen of the shinobi.

“…What the?” the injured man looked down, clueless as to what had just happened. He was not in agony or heavy pain. His face drew sullen and eyes grew pale to the sight of his guts, as they protruded from the laceration caused by the shuriken.

Dara stretched his arms out from side to side and yawned with boredom.
“Shame… thought we could play a little longer”

What is this crude monster…? Vizier found it hard to comprehend what was happening. This was something he had never come across, and the fact that it was occurring before his eyes alarmed him greatly.

Stalling around will only delay our inevitable fate – we must do something now Sweat had begun building up as anxiety overwhelmed him and everyone on the rescue mission.

A series of earth spikes began breaking through the ground as Dara pounced away from each one.

“Not good enou—“ His sudden emotional change disturbed his thought track as Dara soon found himself within an earth dome mid-air.

“Now everyone except Nibui, increase the layers!” Vizier barked from behind. His palms sweatier than ever, his heart pounded like drums from within.

Every other shinobi waved hand-seals around and increased the layers of earth around the dome which covered Dara, it had now taken the shape of one massive, hard lump of earth which incarcerated the single entity.

Nibui had become fully aware by this point, and began to swiftly forge his own set of hand seals.
His fingers shifted to the shape of a scope near his mouth, as Nibui exhaled a powerful stream of fire which collided with the earth dome, making it progressively hotter on the inside.

“There’s no way he can leave this untouched” Vizier exclaimed. A glimpse of hope had rushed through him.

“Fire style – infernal embodiment jutsu” the muffled voice from within the dome silenced the crowd.

What?!

Without warning, the dome was punctured from the front as a large, fiery arm hurriedly swarmed outwards, leaving chunks of rock to drop beneath him.

The men only had enough time to bounce backwards in defence before the large arm grappled three of the shinobi, weakening the earth dome and delivering panic across the temple.

Their torsos began tarnishing and burning away as the grip tightened, leaving behind nothing but bloodied and incinerated corpses.

Why is this happening? Why can I feel this pain on my back? Nibui withdrew from the attack and dropped to his knees one more time.

Dara also withdrew his arm back into the dome.

89… aaaaand 90… he has finally broken the threshold and entered the zone Dara giggled from within, his nasty smirk returned as a challenge finally arose.

The young boy’s body began morphing mentally and physically. Veins emerged to the surface as his blood began to boil. His consciousness had drifted off into a distant reality – a reality where the only goal for his soul was to embrace the energy, let it take over and eliminate the opposition.

Energy, energy.
Giving it everything.
Blade goes through enemies, no one is brave.
Murdering, murdering.
Eliminate everything.
Everyone’s getting it, no one is safe.




internet sensation
also known as Snoopy
has a bigger dick than you

Offline Toratsume Nyshn

  • Genin Donator
  • Jonin Poster
  • *
  • Posts: 870
  • Reputation Power: 5
  • Toratsume Nyshn has no influence.
  • Gender: Male
  • Morigakure Elder
    • View Profile
  • Clan:
  • Organization: Heathen,


    Glory to the Black Rose
Re: Chapter 13 - Burn, baby, burn
« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2017, 18:28:22 »
Oh finally...Teh Zone!
The kills were described quite nicely, I could imagine how much pain and gore they caused.
Good job on this one... now eager for Nibui v2 to shine :)




Offline StriderOtaku

Re: Chapter 13 - Burn, baby, burn
« Reply #2 on: July 08, 2017, 20:11:49 »
Finaaaally! This was epic.
Was gonna ask why they didn't just mutilate Dara within the earth dome then I remembered the whole immortality thing, dang. And the way the rescue guys are getting pwned, lmao.
Can't wait for the actual fight in the next chapter.
The verse at the end kinda played like a theme song/OST in my head, I liked it.
  • Character Name: Ikiryo

Offline Suroshi

  • Chunin Poster
  • ***
  • Posts: 133
  • Reputation Power: 2
  • Suroshi has no influence.
  • Gender: Male
  • 𝐈 𝐒𝐌𝐄𝐋𝐋...𝗗𝗘𝗔𝗗 𝗡𝗜𝗡𝗝𝗔
    • View Profile
Re: Chapter 13 - Burn, baby, burn
« Reply #3 on: July 08, 2017, 20:42:22 »
Dope
  • Character Name: Suroshi

Offline IbrahimRafi

  • Genin Poster
  • **
  • Posts: 85
  • Reputation Power: 2
  • IbrahimRafi has no influence.
  • Gender: Male
  • It’s hard to explain
    • View Profile
  • Clan: Raiu
  • Organization: Blackbox
Re: Chapter 13 - Burn, baby, burn
« Reply #4 on: July 09, 2017, 19:59:32 »
This was one in your best chapters yet, well done.
I like the quote about the blade being remembered and not the name, made things much more tense  and engaged me with the chapter more.




Pls stay.
  • Character Name: Raiden

Offline taigakun

Re: Chapter 13 - Burn, baby, burn
« Reply #5 on: July 09, 2017, 23:27:59 »
Love how descriptive the chapter was. Last chapter was set up perfectly for this one and like how you executed it. +rep


 

Recent Topics

Yarden by mamita
Yesterday at 22:19:27

Fampo by mamita
Yesterday at 22:12:41

Yasu *TBC* by mamita
Yesterday at 22:11:15

Chikaze Yoba Akaihono by mamita
Yesterday at 22:09:50

Nobusumi Himitsu by mamita
Yesterday at 22:08:30

Sareko Akaihono by mamita
Yesterday at 22:05:25

Tameshi Hinode by mamita
Yesterday at 21:50:45

My Character by mamita
Yesterday at 21:46:45

Takaoki Akaihono by mamita
Yesterday at 21:19:35

Onyú by mamita
Yesterday at 21:17:37

Top Posters

Mars
Posts: 2638
Reminance
Posts: 2233
Shivraj
Posts: 1610
m4r1us
Posts: 1298
Manuster
Posts: 1267
NinjaMirage
Posts: 1165
Nova
Posts: 1140
taigakun
Posts: 1094
Fraudulent
Posts: 1086
Konohuro
Posts: 1056